I began to realize I had a gift for communicating when I was 16. The first time I stood up to speak in front of a group of my peers was when I was 16. I was in a speech class that I took to fill a hole in my schedule.

One of the speeches we had to write and present was a persuasive speech. One of the commercials that was often on television (yes, television) at that time was one where a man with a white beard would walk around a place halfway across the world and show us children who were dying because of starvation and aids. He would make a plea, a dollar a day (or something like that) to help aids orphans. Well for my persuasive speech I thought of that commercial and decided that I would attempt to persuade my speech class to give a dollar a day to help those children.

I researched, I prepared, I wrote cues for myself on white note cards. When it was my turn, I stood up and started to give my speech. Halfway through the 5 minute presentation I had a realization. These people were listening to me. I had captivated them. After I was finished My teacher, Mr. Hermann, decided we would have a jar to put money in to help aids orphans. He affirmed what I realized during that speech. I am good at talking in front of people.

Recently John MacArthur, the same one whose commentary I carried back and forth across Europe, made some pretty strong statements about women who talk about the Bible from the stage. Women like me. Here is what I want to say about it, if someone is telling you that you can’t use your gift that God has given you, smile politely and use it anyways.

The passion that you have been given, the ability to see the world or a situation a certain way, your tenderness, your empathy, your strength, your voice - they were all given to you by your Creator. Every part of you, surrendered to Him, is powerful, necessary and purposeful. How you use what He has gifted you with is between you and Him. If He opens the door, you should walk through it.

There will be people who, well meaning or not, will try and discourage you from taking the next step. We have an enemy that is out to steal, kill and destroy our lives, and he knows your insecurities and will whisper in your ear all the reasons why you shouldn’t walk out the giftings that God has given you. Tell him to shut up and walk anyways.

I have been going through and editing old blog posts and being my own worst critic I have felt embarrassed. So often the things I have put into the world haven’t been exactly like I would have liked and in retrospect I want to delete them from happening. Can anyone relate to this? As we walk out the plans God has for us, it will be messy and imperfect. Some things you will want to take back. This process of walking in faith to be more like Jesus, it is called sanctification and it will be messy and imperfect. Walk forward anyways.

I was sitting in church a few weeks ago. The song for the offering started, I didn’t know the song, it was new to me so I couldn’t tell you what the words were other than it was a song of surrender and worship to Jesus. It had barely started so the music wasn’t at the point yet to elicit an emotional response. It was then that out of the corner of my eye I saw In the middle of hundreds of sitting church attenders one lone girl in her early 20’s, standing with hands raised and eyes closed worshipping her Savior. I tear up thinking about it. She was so in love with Jesus. Then, seconds later there was another woman, this one older, right in front of her, who raised her hands high. She stayed seated, her eyes were also closed, and she had no idea that the younger one behind her was doing the same. 

And I thought, we are all leaders. We just are. Those women offered themselves in worship to their Creator. This is what we are privileged to do every day. To take what God has given us and to give it back to him. It may be messy, others may not understand, but it is good, do it anyways.