Big things, Small things or heart things?
Sunday night I was at a leadership event put on by local pastors. The intention behind the event was to pour back into leaders in their community who pour out. Chris and I got a a personal invitation, they fed us dinner and flew in a leadership coach who spoke. There were even gourmet cupcakes, all for free. I texted the pastors after I left and thanked them for pastoring, in my experience this kind of leadership is few and far between.
One of the things the leadership coach, Miles Welch, said (and forgive me, I didn’t write it down so this is from my memory which, admittedly can be lacking) was he believes everyone is longing to live for something more, something beyond themselves. When we choose not to live for something beyond ourselves, we follow our appetites. A new car, a bigger and better house, etc. Once you choose to live for something bigger than yourself you start sacrificing things. He ended with a little shrug and saying something like, “it’s crazy.”
When Chris and I got in the car and we were talking about how good the night was, I reflected on the statement I paraphrased above saying it was maybe one of the most true statements I had heard in awhile. I resonated with the term crazy to define the life I have been living since God told me following him meant engaging in anti human trafficking work. I felt his surrender in the last statement, like when you get gripped by something bigger than yourself you look crazy, sometimes, if we are being honest a lot of times, you feel crazy too.
I talk with nonprofit founders and leaders often. There isn’t one type of person who is a nonprofit leader. We come in all shapes and sizes. Our skill sets, gifting, passions, processes, communities, networks - all different. There is no right kind of person to start a nonprofit. There is however something that unites us, and I see it when I look in a nonprofit leader’s eyes. There is a perseverance there, a grit shows up developed through a process of being gripped and deciding to allow the trajectory of their life to be changed in order to do something about whatever it is that has gripped them.
A large majority of my nonprofit leaders and friends are also people of faith. They are doing what they are doing out of a gripping first by Jesus and second because He led them to the issue they are now working to bring his restoration to.
I have been asking people a question for over 15 years and it is:
“If you could do anything, what would you do?”
I love this question, I think it jars people from a thinking track of “what is expected” or “what is successful” and opens them to “what am I created for” kind of thinking. Our God is a big, creative God and I believe when the Bible says before the foundation of the world he had a plan for me, and you. I love that God can do more than I can ask, think or imagine in and through me. I am most definitely in the camp of “God wants to do big things through you” and I always have been.
A few years ago Josh Wilson came out with a song called “dream small”. Oh boy, it made me feel some kinda way. It came out around a time when it was trendy for Christians, especially women bloggers, to talk about how they didn’t believe God wanted them to do “big things”.
This was challenging for me. At the time, I was in the midst of raising babies, toddlers and early elementary girls. I was in the thick of diapers, nursing, and homeschooling. These women who were writing about not doing big things for God were my people. The stay at home, homeschooling, church going, raising babies mamas were my community. In the midst of this raising baby season, God was also turning my world upside down and leading me on this path to speak up against modern day slavery and exploitation. It felt huge for me. My world consisted of the seemingly small and the seemingly big.
I know now, and began to learn then, usually when people come out with strong statements about what we should or shouldn’t be doing it is because they felt judged or attacked first. Those exhausted mamas wanted what they were doing to matter, they were living an exhausting life and wanted to be told “it’s ok, good job” instead of, “do more, be more.” I resonate with this and if you are a mama in this season, following Jesus isn’t another box to check. You can rest in Him, check out John 15, this is his command for us. To rest in him.
As a nonprofit leader I have learned, attacking people and the way they are living their life is not the way to inspire people to see how they can be a part of change. If people feel defensive after they leave me, it because of two reasons. Either they feel convicted by something I said and they aren’t in a place where they want to change (this has very little to do with me) or, I came at them in a harsh way with the information I was bringing (this has everything to do with me).
If our strategy for challenging our culture’s status quo is finger pointing and judgement, we will continue to go nowhere fast. This route can feel like the most direct way to get things done (and if you know me, I value directness in a real way) and where it is the fastest way to gain followers of people who think just like you, or to get your message out there, it is not the fastest way to create a culture of change.
In theory, I agree with Josh Wilson’s song “Dream Small” and I can relate to and understand the movement of mom’s who are seeking value for the seemingly insignificant things they do every day . In the last few years I have begun to coin the term “ small things are big things. Those “small” dreams, “small” acts of service, “small” choices to love those around you every single day are anything but small. They are huge. In God’s economy, seemingly small acts of daily obedience of love, service and sacrifice are the building blocks for whatever he asks of you next. And I think that is where we can have a miss when we talk about how the “small” things matter. Theses “small” things are God asking you to be faithful right now, where you are at, with what he has given you so that you can then be given more and more to be faithful with to use for his glory.
The problem with using the words “small” and “big” when it comes to Jesus followers, God and dreams is, his definition of these words and our human definitions couldn’t be more different. God’s definitions always go back to heart change, motives, dependence on him, and humility to name a few of the characteristics. Our human definitions focus on impact, numbers, money, recognition. Worldly success and Godly success are polar opposites in their metrics, at least or especially at the beginning of something.
The determining factor of success for a Christian will not necessarily be the outward metrics humans are used to using to qualify success. This doesn’t mean following Jesus doesn’t equal some version of human success, it does and it can, but how God decides to grow a thing is up to him and the metrics he values are those of changed hearts, starting with yours and mine.
This takes us all the way back to the leadership event I was at last night and the statement I poorly paraphrased from Miles about how we are either living for something bigger than ourselves or following our appetites. Here is the thing, only you and I can know if what we do every day is what God has called us to, is living for the thing bigger than ourselves (ultimately, Him) or not. Each and everyone of us is different and in different places of our faith journeys. When I live for something bigger than myself, it is most likely going to look different outwardly than when you do.
However, just like with my nonprofit leader friends, we will share a look in our eyes that is the same. A gritty look born out of choosing to surrender to Jesus, to be dependent on Him, His call, His way. A look that says I will follow Him even though it makes me crazy. Even thought it means sacrificing my appetites for something bigger than myself. I am gripped and I have to do it.
The measurement of a Jesus follower is not whether they are doing “big” or “small” things by worldly standards. In my experience, it is a weird mix of both. Whatever worldly success you do see was built on many small, hard, daily decisions to keep going in the same direction (long time obedience or perseverance).
More and more I am learning that to follow Jesus is true life, but to the world it is going to look like many forms of death. Maybe death of our finances, death of our status, death of our social position, death of a body image. This is what surrender looks like, surrendering our human appetites to God and saying all I really crave is you and I trust you to take care of everything else I want or need, so I will follow.
Last week was Veteran’s Day and I was struck by what sacrifice looks like. It is beautiful, heartbreaking and hard. To serve in the Armed Forces takes sacrifice from those who sign up and those who love those who sign up. The many who have given their lives through death remind me of what Jesus said about loving people, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” Right before he said this, he asked us to love others how He loved us. By giving up His life, he set an example for us; to give up our lives, our appetites, for others.
I can’t tell you what this looks like for you, because for each one of us it is different. It may look big or small, and what is small for you may be big for me and vice versa, and how it looks on the outside doesn’t really matter because God looks at the heart anyways. What I can tell you is what I have learned about following Jesus into what the world says is crazy; it is worth it. Because He is worth it. In daily choosing to surrender my appetites, God has taken care of everything I need and then some. He can be trusted, He is good and to follow him is not a risk but truly a great reward.
P.S. If you want to do something special to honor the veterans in your life, check out one of my nonprofit leader friends organizations, Operation Empowering Hope. She sends books, supplies, and encouraging notes to our troops stationed in hard places. You can be a part of loving a soldier in a big way by doing a seemingly small thing. <3